"Happy" Birthday to ME....

Today is my birthday! Cue the confetti and birthday horns, and maybe even a cupcake or two.

Me and my mom on my 1st birthday.....wow is this not crazyyyy

I am hugeeee on birthdays. Seriously, I’m the extra friend who throws surprise parties, writes long, heartfelt posts, and if I had the cash (cries in broke college student), I’d buy gifts for every single person I know. I’m also the random stranger who will go out of my way to tell you "Happy Birthday" like it’s the most important thing in the world. 

Funny story: when I was a server, no matter how busy I was, I’d make sure every birthday felt

one of the many plates i decorated!!

like a spectacle. I’d decorate a dessert plate, add a candle—the whole shebang—because in my world, birthdays are anything but ordinary.

Birthdays are my way of celebrating the beautiful fact that someone special was brought into this world. And why wouldn’t we celebrate that? I say all this to make it clear—I’m a birthday lover, not a birthday hater.

But here’s where things take a turn: recently, MY birthday hasn’t been giving me the same warm fuzzies. It used to be my favorite day, but now it feels more like a reminder of what’s missing. I don’t know if it’s because I’m getting older or if it’s the stress that comes with the day, but I’ve started to kind of despise it. And yeah, I know despise is a strong word, but it’s real.

I could give you the sob stories of my birthday disasters—the forgotten birthdays, ruined relationships, plans falling through, or the tears I’ve cried—but I’ve realized something: my birthday doesn’t define my worth.

A very wise man told me that this year on my birthday I should be grateful for the little things. So, today, instead of planning something extravagant, my birthday plans are... nothing. Yep, you read that right. No big celebrations, no over-the-top surprises. By the time you’re reading this, I’ll hopefully be relaxing at home, watching one of my favorite movies, eating something delicious, and chatting with the people I love, doing what makes me happy.  I might even splurge on some things I’ve been eyeing, because why not?

At first, I didn’t want to do anything for my birthday to avoid the usual disappointment, but I had to shift my mindset. Sure, my birthday is special, but so is every other day I’m alive. If I can’t find joy in this day, I can still find it in the life I’m living. I’m healthy, and I’m happy. So no, I’m not taking trips to Paris or living out wild dreams, but I’m at peace with my life, and that’s worth celebrating. And hey, I can still enjoy all the birthday freebies, right?

I have been on this path of evolution in many ways since entering my 20s. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that everyone’s journey is unique. My story is no one else’s story so why would this part of it be any different?

the most amazing card (i am notorious for keeping these to reminisce)

I am smart, talented, and important. I matter and I am loved and valued, if by no one else by God and that right there is enough for me. However, there are some pretty cool people roaming the world that I know love me which isn’t too shabby if I must say so myself. 

I’ve been blessed with so much, and I’m learning that how I show up for myself might just look different now. I’m no birthday grinch—I’ll still go big for others—but I’m also learning to celebrate me. Because if I don’t, who will?

And let’s be real: every day I’m alive is a blessing, not just my birthday.

So now, it’s your turn—how are you going to start showing up for yourself? Let me know in the comments. I hope this encourages you to celebrate the little things like I am. Let’s find joy in them together.

Until next time!! Thanks for reading and I hope you’ll meet me back here soon.

With love, 

Lailah